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Items Tagged With Noah Berkowitz

Bottled Water Scam Exposed: Yeah, I Tapped That!
Written By: Noah Berkowitz
2007-08-13 22:34:37
Photo:micaht2000, Creative Commons, Flickr
Beverage giants PepsiCo and Coca-Cola are reeling this week from backlash to the news that their bottled water products are a total sham.

Pepsi's Aquafina brand tap water announced last week that it would change the PWS logo printed on its bottles to a more descriptive ‘Public Water Source’. Company spokeswoman Debra Spencer said "Obviously, it has always been tap water. Our customers are idiots. Are you forgetting that we introduced Crystal Pepsi?"


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Bush Adds Subprime Mortgages to Axis of Evil
Written By: Noah Berkowitz
2007-12-09 19:35:38
Following a turbulent week with regard to foreign policy, President Bush has temporarily removed Iran from the Axis of Evil. For the time being, Bush announced that subprime mortgages would be joining the Axis of Evil on a trial basis.
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China Celebrates Labor Day
Written By: Noah Berkowitz
2007-09-02 18:33:26
Citizens of the People's Republic of China are celebrating Labor Day today throughout their country. To mark Labor Day celebrations in China, millions of Chinese people will be working.

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Intervention Held for Erratic Dow Jones
Written By: Noah Berkowitz
2007-08-07 10:25:22
After a particularly reckless week, the closest friends and family of Dow Jones staged an intervention in an attempt to stabilize her erratic swings. Jones, largely known for her promiscuity, is famous for being filled by thirty large organizations at the same time. The scrutiny of being a public figure with a promiscuous reputation has led Jones to struggles with severe highs and lows and stints in rehab. Following her largest surge in nearly five years, Jones was confronted about her lack of stability.

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Real Estate Slumps, Sandcastles Practically Worthless
Written By: Noah Berkowitz
2007-09-25 19:01:43
The latest report from the National Association of Realtors brought discouraging news this week to many invested in real estate. An alarming report revealed that despite ocean views and beachfront property, sandcastles are practically worthless.


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